“Time is ticking” My maid of honor says. “I know, but I can’t decide,” I say softly.

“Lucy, think about what you want, not anybody else, what do you want?”When my bridesmaid asks me this I fall silent. What do I want? I don’t want to be here, at this altar. My choice matters.

I don’t want to be in this big, uncomfortable, white ball gown dress. I didn’t want this, my parents did. But they’d be so ashamed of me if I disobeyed them. But this isn’t what I want. I want to be free, not with him, Ryan. “You’re right, this isn’t what I want.” I stand.

The piano music begins as I enter the church and walk to the altar. I look at my soon to be ex fiance and my parents. My mother is crying silently as my dad consoles her. I almost feel bad but then I realize they were the ones who put me in this moment forcefully.

“Do you wish to be Ryan Morgan’s offly wedded husband?” The priest asks me. I pause, it feels like the world has gone silent. All eyes are on me waiting for my answer. I feel the sweat starting to form and my throat feels like it’s closing. I open my mouth say quietly say,

“No”

I wake up swiftly in my bedroom, sweating a little. I calm myself down and look over to Ryan, my sleeping husband. He’s passed out like a baby and I give him a little kiss and nuzzle back into him. “What an awful nightmare” I whisper. With that I go to bed and doze off.